Wedding Planning For A Non-Wedding Planning Person

Fiance and I are currently starting to plan our very own wedding! I love weddings. I love booze, food, dancing, my family, and big parties. I am alllllllll about other people's weddings. I was a bridesmaid in my big brother's wedding, and more recently was incredibly honored to serve as Maid of Honor in my best friend's wedding. 

But that doesn't mean that I love planning my own wedding! Everyone always talks about how stressful and crazy that time is. How many arguments have stemmed from ridiculous things like centerpieces or the order of the processional??

So far, Fiance and I have managed to not have much stress in this planning time. To be fair, it's pretty new and we haven't had to do TOO much, but we have accomplished some great things! We have a guest list, therefore we have the size of the event. We have picked out colors, the bridal party, and have narrowed down venues to 3 that we like. We have a budget in mind, and I've even scheduled dress shopping!

The budget is a tough one for me. I never planned on having a big wedding, despite my love of other people's big weddings. I never truly comprehended spending the equivalent of a down payment on a house for just one day. I have slowly accepted that the big wedding, the family event, is what we're doing. And I'm even excited about it! The money still sends a pang through my heart and my bank account. It doesn't matter to me that we can afford it. It matters to me the sheer amount! 

But Fiance is amazing at reassuring me that we are worth it. We love our family and friends, and we want to have the people we love with us for this momentous celebration. 

So, here I am, planning a big wedding. I have read blogs and articles, I have a checklist, and we are trucking through making the bigger decisions. I am a very organized and list-oriented person (thanks, Mom!!), so I am pretty ok with knowing the general timelines and what we need to do and stuff like that. I never even planned to have a big wedding! I always thought I would have a smaller affair, less party, more celebrating gathering. :)

While I don't think Fiance or I are particularly traditional people, we are also not super nontraditional, so we're having a pretty traditional wedding. I don't plan on having a train at all (I don't like trains or bustles), I am iffy on a veil at all (and definitely not a long one), and I plan on wearing flats (comfort, people! I like to dance!). I have also learned that I have no desire to wear a sparkly bling-filled wedding dress, and despite living in NYC, I will not be shopping at Kleinfelds. Why go somewhere I can't afford?!

In the end, I know it will be a beautiful day, filled with the people we love. And that is most important. Not the centerpieces, not what color the chair sashes are, and not what shoes Fiance is wearing. And this is why I think we've managed to not fight or stress too much so far. The day is important, yes. But the marriage that follows is a million times more important. 

Also, I cannot stress enough how much I HATE when people say "You're the bride! It's YOUR day!"

That is crap. If it were just my day, then I wouldn't need the groom to be there. People, it is OUR day. Fiance may not care about the little details of planning, but he is fully aware of them, and voices his opinion on stuff. It would never be happening if it weren't for both of us. OUR DAY. Just because I'm going to look superfly in my fancypants long dress, doesn't mean in any way that the attention should only be on me. Besides, you haven't SEEN Fiance all dressed up. Dude looks awesome in a suit.

Jumping On The Vaccine Argument Train

I quite honestly don't truly understand the anti-vaccine "movement." I put movement in quotes because for one, it's the dumbest thing I can think of right now, and secondly, it's a very loud minority, not a large group speeding through the right side of history, standing for equal rights or anything.

It's a decent size group of idiots who refuse to believe any and all of the scientific data proving that vaccines have no link to autism, and continuously citing a now-debunked study done by a "scientist" who lost his license for fabricating the data in that specific study, making that link.

The hardest part is that when you talk to anti-vaxxers (what a stupid name), no amount of education, cited sources, or relevant information you show them, they will steadfastly refuse to change their minds or in any way open up to the idea that they may be wrong.

I'd put money on the fact that most of these anti-vaxxers are they themselves vaccinated, so I'm not sure why or how they came to the conclusion that it's better not to.

This is not going to be a long rant.

Vaccinate your children.

There are so many parents out there who say to women and couples that don't want or plan on having kids that they are selfish for not "contributing to the future generation." You know what's selfish? Exposing your kids and countless others that they come in contact with to infectious and serious diseases that had basically been eradicated, because you think you know better than the entire scientific community, based on some random article you "read online somewhere."

Vaccinate your damn children so that someday, when and if I decide to bring kids into this eff-ed up world, they can safely go about their lives NOT being exposed to measles, mumps, polio, and any other random disease you feel like your kid should be allowed to get.


VACCINATE YOUR KIDS, PEOPLE! Science is being continually expanded upon, our knowledge changing and growing over time. Even religious scientists agree that you should vaccinate. Don't be an idiot and stop risking your kids' health instead of listening to your doctor.