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Tuesday, January 12, 2016

Wedding Vows for the Millennial Generation

I have always hated over-generalizations and being lumped into the "millennial generation." Millennials are defined as the people between the ages of 18 and 34 in 2015. Annoyingly, this includes me. We are preceeded by Generation X (ages 35 to 50 in 2015, HAHA BIG BROTHER!), and of course the ever-talked-about Baby Boomers (51 to 69 in 2015). Both Gen X and Millennials are surpassing the Boomers in numbers! Go us?

Well, even though Millennials seem to get a bad rap in the media, my generation has been chock full of innovators, inventors, world-changers, and more. So, there.

And things have certainly changed a TON in the years since our Boomer parents were growing up and getting married. Gone are the "in sickness and in health until one of us dies" and here to stay are custom vows. 

If you look up wedding vows online, there are a million sources with ideas, examples, and more. You can even watch videos of other peoples' weddings to get ideas on what to say to your beloved.

I think I can do better than that. I'm getting married next week (eee!) and I've put a lot of thought into some updated wedding vows for the 21st century. Feel free to steal some of my beautiful words, as I make my pledge to my favorite fiance.
"I promise to not slap your hand away every time you steal my food because you eat too fast and I still have half left when you're done, which clearly is an invitation."

"I vow to always send you the link to the hilarious video and not just tell you about it."

“I promise not to watch The Daily Show without you.”

“I promise not to secretly watch episodes of tv shows we both like and then starting chuckling right before a funny line happens when we later watch it together.”

"I vow not to audibly say "what the hell are you watching?!" when you're on your phone and we're in public."

"I vow to order you soup on GrubHub when you are sick. Also, I'll sit on the far side of the couch."

 "I promise to kill you first when you become a zombie, because you'll definitely become one sooner than me, as I run faster than you."

"I promise to let you be right sometimes. Even if Google and Wiki support my position."

"I vow not to talk the whole time you're playing Fallout."

"I vow to always text you back." 

"I promise to put my phone/tablet down now and then and focus all my attention on you. I swear we will have real out-loud conversations."

"I promise to always do the 'soccer-mom-arm' if you are playing with your phone when we're about to cross the street."

"I vow to always ask you for help when I'm using spreadsheets, and because I lost a bet, I officially name you Spreadsheet Master."

"I promise not to abuse Amazon Prime."

"I vow to sometimes let you be the one to choose what Netflix show we watch next."

"I promise to not get mad when you refuse to fast forward through the credits."

"I vow to include songs you like on our road trip playlists."

This whole writing your own vows thing is awesome!!