It happened like a month ago and people are still talking about Miley Cyrus twerking in latex underpants.
Woo-frickity-hoo, people. A young pop star danced in what had more coverage than your average bikini.
Not that I enjoyed her oddly tongue-laced molestation of a foam representation of being number 1, but I think we’re all not talking about the most important thing, here.
A dude dressed as Beetlejuice sang a song about rape on national television and no one cares. His dad is all “I’m so proud of my son!” Yes, let’s be proud of your kid, who sings (did he write this?) “I know you want it. You’re a good girl. Can’t let it get past me.” Alan Thicke, if Kirk Cameron had done this crap on Growing Pains, you would not have been so nice, now would you?
This song was also featured on last week’s Glee. The teacher sang it while surrounded by his musically-inclined class sang backup. Jane Lynch’s evil character Sue Sylvester calls him out on singing a song about rape with a bunch of underage high school students.
She may be a little bit evil, but she’s not wrong. Robin Thicke: a name like a second string almost superhero, songs like an asshole frat boy.
First, I’d like to point out the sheer elegance and sophistication of today’s pop hits. Lady Gaga has penned a ballad that will go down as a classic, her lines “I live for the applause, applause applause. I live for the applause-plause, Live for the applause-plause.” just touches my soul in a way Billy Joel just never quite has.
Bruno Mars recently posited to the world: “You and me baby making love like gorillas.”
And I am not saying that the hippies are right and the music from the last generation “meant something” and was so much better and more meaningful than today’s top artists. There is crap music represented in every decade.
I love the Beatles. They had everything from meaningful to ridiculous, and it never gets old. That doesn’t mean every song was a masterpiece. Let’s take an objective look at the opening to “I Am A Walrus”
“I am he as you are he as you are me and we are all together.
See how they run like pigs from a gun, see how they fly.
I'm crying.”
Yes, yes, tell me more. You do not sound like you’re SUPER HIGH AND STUFF or anything. And weirdly, I like that song a lot.
Don’t freak out. I love the Beatles, Springsteen, Billy Joel, Bon Jovi, the Temptations, and a lot of other music that is not of my generation. I still rock out to Lady Gaga with my 6 year old niece in the car, sing along with Katy Perry when it’s stuck in my head. I have a slightly nostalgic lean toward the Backstreet Boys and Avril Lavigne.
I am not condemning your music choices, my friend! I would never do that. I am pointing out that we like ridiculous music sometimes, and that is not an opinion, it is fact. Take a look at some of those lyrics and try to tell me it’s the Starry Night of music.
LOGICKED.
But we often do accept lyrics from our favorite artists that don’t make sense or kind of suck, and we do it because it’s catchy. I don’t like Selena Gomez’s “Come and Get It.” It is literally a song about loving someone and just hanging out, waiting for them to come and hang out with you. Chorus: “When you’re ready come and get it. na na na na.” Line from first full verse: “Can’t stop because I love it, hate the way I love you.”
That is not a healthy relationship right there. You should try counseling or something.
I know songs about real life normal love might not be as exciting, and like I said, it’s not like I don’t dance to these songs or sing along either. I just think we should take an objective view of the situation.
I guess a love ballad like this wouldn’t be as popular:
“Sitting in my sweatpants,
Watching Law & Order with you.
Chinese food and soda,
Typical Tuesday night.
Na na na na.
Saturday afternoon
Sitting around, eating a bagel.
Let’s run off together
To Target for more paper towels.”
But if you think it would be, feel free to make it famous, though I’d like writing credit and royalties. :)
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