Thought & Speech Bubbles of (possibly inappropriate) Stuff You Wish You Said

Having random thought and speech bubbles would be way better than bumper stickers. Don’t get me wrong, both can be snarky or sarcastic or silly or promote your beliefs. But which is more fun: yet another “my delinquent can beat up your honor student” sticker on the car in front of you that just won’t TURN OFF THE DAMN TURN SIGNAL for 7 miles, or interesting and ridiculous non permanent, interchangeable phrases on a bubble?

Also, you could glue or duct tape your thought and speech bubbles to a stick and hold them up with different phrases! I feel like this could catch on. Feel free to use one of my bubbles that I drew out, below!

I had (and still have) a big fake mustache on a stick (it’s a chopstick). This has NOT caught on, though I firmly believe it still will. I have recently been informed that my friend Megan ALSO has a mustache on a stick. This was not planned. I think I love her. When we’re both in DC in 2 weeks, we are going to celebrate our love of fake mustaches by going out for a beer with them.

Boyfriend doesn’t have a mustache, fake or otherwise. He DOES, however, have a delightful goatee that I enjoy stroking, while saying “hmmmmm…” thoughtfully. Obviously, I do this because I do not have a goatee, and everyone thinks better when villainously stroking one. Duh.

Here are some fine examples if things you might wish you had said, want to say, or are afraid to say because SOMEONE might smack you:

(in relationships)

“When you left the room, I picked my nose.”

 “That fart wasn’t the dog…”

“Oh….were you saying something?”

“What? Didn’t we just cuddle LAST night?”

“Yeah? Well, I don’t really CARE what your mom thinks!” *gasp!*

(to your parents)

“NO. JEEEEEEEEEEEZ.”

“Ewwwww, this chicken tastes like a tiger sat on it after it had been left in the sun for week.”

“If by ‘cleaned my room,’ you mean ‘shoved everything in the closet,’ then YEP!”

“I will not be seen in public with you dressed like that.”

“Do I get that ring/this house/those curtains when you kick the bucket?”

(to strangers, with no repercussions)

“What? Yes…exCUSE me?!...wait…are you on Bluetooth?”

“Your hair looks like you set fire to it and tried to put it out by letting ants eat your face.”

“Yes, please just throw your garbage on the ground. Who cares if this is a clean, nice area FOR THE CHILDREN!”

“Don't stare at me while on public transportation. No exceptions. THAT MEANS YOU.”

“I hate you and all that you stand for. Nope, no specific reason why.”