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Wednesday, October 17, 2012

You Ever Just Make Up Words?

Word: Goofbomber.
Definition: It’s a new term I have made up, it derives from the word “goofball” but goes a step further, to describe a person so full of goofiness, that they lay a goofbomb on a group of people, and the goof just explodes outward in a seismic wave. That group of people are unwitting casualties of the goofbomb.
It feels like this, but with no water. Just goofs. Credit: niktaylor.com
Do you know what things are incredibly fun? Extravaganzas. Extravaganzas are fun and the word is incredibly rad, too. Have you ever been to an extravaganza and had a bad time? Of course not! The word has the connotation of fun and sillyness. Perhaps the perfect place to drop a goofbomb on your peeps. And yes, I just used my newly made-up word in a sentence. Miriam-Webster--There is your usage example and definition. In addition, pretty sure it’s a noun. If you need phonetics, you should call me. We have to get this right the first time.
In fact, O Dictionary Gods, I have a few other words you should be adding into your tome and others that need some re-defining. See below.

Word: Amazon.
Definition: The crack that keeps you awake at night, forces you to spend more money than you wanted to, or have, and may or may not have every known thing in the universe available to buy. I LOVE KINDLE. KINDLE AND I ARE IN LOVE.
How could I not be in love with such a dapper and dashing sort??
This is vaguely creepy. but loving!
Word: Baco-splosion.
Definition: When you have a whole bunch of bacon (unit of measure: One Bunch o’ Bacon) and it spontaneously explodes in any or all directions. Hopefully mostly towards your mouth, but if not: I feel bad for you, son, I got 99 problems, but bacon ain’t one.

Word: Fetch.
Definition: Just kidding! Stop trying to make ‘fetch’ happen. It will never happen!
Word: Frastic.
Definition: When a person or animal (refers only to animate beings, does not apply to inanimate objects, even if you hallucinate that they are talking to you) gets really, really busy and are trying to do multiple projects that require time and concentration and effort, and you end up at a frantic and spastic pace. Sometimes, when overly frastic, one may develop a twitch.

Word: Mailfail.
Definition: When you check your mailbox and get all excited because there are several pieces of mail in there, but most of them are not addressed to you, and in fact, are addressed to idiots who haven’t lived there in years, but never had their mail forwarded. Sad, deephearted mailfail. ESPECIALLY if it is a mis-addressed or mis-delivered package. Check out some other interesting things about mail here. Be warned: that link will take you to a post that talks about mail-order brides and other stuff.

Word made up by Megan! Follow her on twitter at @meganbonnell. She is awesome.
Word: Mathmagical.
Definition: 1. When you get the right answer to a math problem, completely by accident.
2. Or that moment when math FINALLY clicks and it all starts to make sense.
(Side note: I never had that special 2nd definition feeling.)

Word: Pants.
Definition: The things that differentiate a workday from a non-workday. (Unless you work from home, in which case, I hate you and all that you stand for. Go put on some pants in solidarity with the rest of us! I DEMAND IT!)

Word: Rudetastrophe.
Definition: The catastrophe that befalls you (or that you deserve, even if you haven’t received it yet.) when you are inexorably rude to others. Examples: Not doing the little finger-wave when I let you in front of me in traffic; Walking on the left side of the sidewalk (bastard!); People who are not appropriately nice to customer service workers.
Customer service includes, but is not limited to: servers, bussers, clerks at hotels, cashiers, baggers, retail workers, and tech support. They are doing their job, you have no business yelling at them, swearing at them, calling them names, or trying to convert them to your religion. If you are not able to firmly, but politely state what is wrong and what kind of solution you’d like, CALM YOURSELF. And then, grow the heck up, chucklehead.
Usage in a sentence: "You're staring down the barrel of a rudetastrophe if you don't BACK IT UP."
It's like raaaaaaa-ee-aaaaaain! On your wedding dayyyy!

Word: Un-brella
Definition: The phenomenon wherein you know it is supposed to rain (or perhaps you don’t. I don’t know you. You might not be a check-the-weather-before-you-leave type of person.) and forget your umbrella, remembering only once it has already started to rain, and you reach for the phantom umbrella you could just swear you put in your bag this morning.

You know the problem with the word “awful”? The problem is that it could easily be used as “full of awesomeness” or “you are full of awe when you bask in the glory that is my rainbow of special.” Except it means the opposite. It means something is terrible and gross and probably smells, too. What a waste of a perfectly good word.

I don’t know. I just have a thing for words. It may be because my mother is an English/reading teacher and has been for my entire existence. It may be because I read a LOT. Perhaps because I am a writer? When I write a song or a poem, I spend time making sure the words, the phrases come together to form the exact image I want to emote.
Or it could be because I am a weirdo who over-analyzes things like how to word FEELS when I say or how my mouth is shaped. Who knows? I also have a strange enjoyment of certain numbers and dislike of others.

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